Do You Have An Itty Bitty Shitty Committee?

[00:00:00] Lauren: You’re a high-octane business owner. You got a team. On paper, it looks like you’re rolling in success. But there’s a voice inside of you. Whisper screaming best isn’t sustainable, something feels, and I’m going to lose it.

Sound familiar. That’s where I come in.[00:00:30] 

my name is Lauren Goldstein and I’m the CEO at golden key partnership. I help top level executives like you avoid burning out and burning down as you’re scaling up. How. By harnessing your superpowers, finding and hiring your ideal team and then simplifying the heck out of your business operation. [00:01:00] It’s my mission and the mission of this podcast to help you see operations in a whole new light to help you diagnose the real root cause of your company challenges and to bring your business back to a healthy.

And they call me the business doctor. And this is the biz doctor podcast.[00:01:30] 

Welcome back to the show. In today’s episode, I’m going to dive into a subject that’s very close to my heart self-sabotage or what I like to refer to as the itty bitty shitty. This episode is for anyone that’s ever launched something and told no one who sat at home wondering when they might be quote unquote found out, or my favorite, anyone who has taken a step forward and then falls off the cliff of second guessing.

Now lean and close. I have a vulnerable confession. I’ve been that person. And [00:02:00] truthfully, there are days when my 80 bitty shitty committee is quite loud and the fear kicks. And chances are, if you’re an entrepreneur or a human being, you two have experienced this. So let’s dive in and see how we can quiet down the committee.

First, let’s get clear on what self-sabotage actually is and why it happens. Self-sabotage is any thought or behavior that undermines progress self-sabotage is really a subconscious program run by your ego and the amygdala, both of [00:02:30] which fear change because in their perspective, change equals. Speaking of death.

Did you know that statistics show that people fear public speaking more than actual death? Literally, they are more scared of getting in front of a room and speaking than they are of actually dying. And I think that perfectly illustrates the point that our ego and our amygdala, our mad scientists trying to keep us.

I honestly don’t know a single person that has died from public speaking, [00:03:00] but I do know a heck of a lot of people that have changed their lives and countless others lives because they have the courage to step on stage. But this thought change equals death is how the brain keeps us stuck at status quo.

It creates a false narrative that if we step outside our comfort zone, that we will in fact die a terrible death and never, ever recover, which leads me to the sneaky second part of self-sabotage false rewards. The truth is most of us stay in our comfort zones are stories that don’t serve us [00:03:30] because of a false reward.

Now, in case you don’t want to know what a false reward is, it’s a reward that is perceived by the brain as positive, which enables the cycle to connect. Let’s say you secretly launched a new service, AKA created something and then told no one. Anyone else guilty of that? I’m raising my hand to see you now, if it’s just me cool.

But if you’ve ever launched something and then told no one, because you were afraid now that you’re not alone. Anyway, let’s say you did this and then no [00:04:00] one bought it. Logically. This makes perfect sense. No one can buy something they don’t know about. But the self-sabotage says, see, I knew you were pretending or that product wasn’t great or no one wants to buy from you.

And then the tricky false reward comes in. You tell your friends or your mentors about how the launch fell on its face, and they reassure you that you are successful. That it’s just one launch that you have value that it’s great. And it’s going to go better next time. Do you see the cycle? [00:04:30] Do you see how the action of not doing something AKA?

Staying in the comfort zone was reinforced with words of affirmation. Now that was a pretty obvious example, but it can be much more sneaky self-sabotage and false rewards show up in just about any aspect of our life. If we’re not paying attention. What I witnessed recently with somebody picking a fight with their business partner, because suddenly everything in the business was running too well.

And they were bored. They picked a fight so they [00:05:00] could get the false reward of needing to problem, solve, fix something, or be needed. Talk about self-sabotage and not good for business. So now that you know what it is and where it hides, I’m sure you’re asking yourself, well, how the heck do I stop this crazy train?

Good news. There’s a few ways. The first is awareness. I know this sounds simple and too easy, but it really is the key. It’s perhaps one of the single most impactful things, but also the most challenging to do [00:05:30] consistently. Why? Because our subconscious mind runs 95% of our day. That means that our lives are 95% on autopilot based on old beliefs, stories, data, et cetera.

Can we just stop and think about that for a minute? We literally are going through our days with only 5% conscious, everything else is being run behind the scenes. If you doubt this for any moment, just ask yourself. When the last [00:06:00] time you drove yourself home thinking about something else and said, how the heck did I get home?

Subconscious. Also very scary. I digress don’t get me wrong. Not having to think about blinking, pumping my heart, breathing every few seconds is great, but having the itty bitty shitty committee that was formed years ago and is not in alignment to the leadership and the vision that I’m creating now is a big pain in the butt.

So the way to unseat your itty [00:06:30] bitty shitty committee really comes down to awareness and being willing to notice, to observe, to see. G that thought action, whatever it doesn’t seem to be aligning with where we are going. I mean, the truth is we’re all making it up as we go along anyways. So we might as well make sure the stories, our beautiful mind is telling us are supportive and moving us closer to our goal.

Yes or yes. And if you’re thinking to yourself, I’m not making it up. Surely that’s not true. [00:07:00] The reality is it’s true because every person has a different perspective and a different story. So even if you are a twin, you have a different perspective on life and you’ve had different experiences that shaped the stories that run through your life.

The second step outside of awareness is having someone in your life who can hold you accountable to your efficient. This is huge because when the freight train of self-sabotage gets a full head of steam, sometimes it’s really, really hard to stop it before it goes off the cliff. [00:07:30] And sometimes it’s a little baby cliff, and sometimes it’s a huge cliff that could have catastrophic consequences.

So, if you have someone in your corner that can help you buckle in your anybody shitty committee into the car seat, in the back seat and shift you back into the driver’s seat, then you are already many steps ahead of everyone else. This could be a coach, a mentor, a mastermind. It really doesn’t matter who it is.

It just matters that they are louder than your committee, and [00:08:00] they can get you to remember your vision for just a split second longer than the tantrum, your subconscious and ego, or how. The last after kicking self-sabotage in the teeth is getting really, and I may really comfortable with the uncomfortable.

We all know that our comfort zone is like sitting in front of a perfect fire on the perfect couch with the perfect blanket and a cup of hot cocoa, all snuggled in, but let’s get real. If you aren’t growing, you are dying. And although that scene sounds [00:08:30] delightful, save it for a winter in real life and start doing something every day that makes you uncomfortable.

Everything we want comes to life as a result of getting really happy living in the gap. The gap is the space between where you are and where you want to be. The gap is sometimes a few hours and sometimes it’s a few years, but the thing I know without question is the more comfortable you are dancing in the gap of uncertainty, discomfort, and growth, the more impactful, rewarding, abundant, and fulfilling [00:09:00] your life for.

In fact, getting comfortable in this gap is why I created the C-suite. I heard from too many of my clients, how they struggled to find something that would give them the tools to step into the wobbly newness of leading their business. And that was a safe space to talk about the mental health challenges that come with being an honorable.

Solving these two very real needs is why I created the C-suite. I took my neuroscience background, my board certification in NLP and merged it with my business consulting [00:09:30] superpowers to create a hybrid container, to not only support business owners and becoming a high performing leader, but also create a community where we talk about the ups and downs of being an entree.

We all know, building a business is not all sunshine and rainbows, which is why I’m so passionate about entrepreneurial, mental health and why the C-suite is my heart’s calling, supporting you to build a high performing business in life without falling victim, to the things going on between your ears.

That can keep you playing small. If you want to know more or step into the [00:10:00] C-suite connect with me in our website, golden key partnership.com or on LinkedIn, you want to know more about the CEO mindset. I invite you to go back and listen to episode. Yeah. You’re 80 bitty shitty committee is fired. Their time is up.

Now I’ll leave you with this self sabotage and having an itty bitty shitty committee is something all of us have, but it doesn’t mean it gets the power to run your life or your business. You get to take back your power and acknowledge it for trying to keep you safe [00:10:30] and then just kiss it and buckle it into the backseat.

That’s it for this week’s episode, I’d love to hear from you and your biggest takeaways. So make sure you’re following along, tag me on Instagram or LinkedIn or wherever you hang out on the interwebs

So, which part of your business needs, love and attention? You might be wondering that here are [00:11:00] your next steps.

Hey, did golden key partnership.com or the show notes below to schedule your diagnostic deep dive

Thanks for listening to the base doctor podcast. If you love the show, please share it with your colleagues or tag me on social media, especially LinkedIn and subscribe to the show wherever you get your podcast.[00:11:30]